August 13

Hello everyone, Darren seems to think it's "curious" that I send updates EVERY day. He asked "what do you write about? I didn't do anything today." I tried to explain that so many people just want to know how he's doing, what he's doing, and how we are. What he doesn't see as anything "big" might be HUGE to me. I try not to over-exaggerate, but I get excited at the littlest things! Today, the occupational therapist said Darren should be brushing his own teeth. I was so excited, since as the official tooth-brusher, I didn't feel as if I was doing such a good job. But he felt inadequate that he hasn't been doing it along. So tonight we will try that! In addition to his feeding himself each meal, he fed himself a handful of gummi bears, held a small milk container, and was using his cell phone. Not very pretty to watch sometimes, and hard to see him struggle, but worth every effort! He is excited to watch the Olympics, and has a busy week scheduled. So we will try to rest up this weekend so he is prepared for more hard work. John was out with another dad for dinner (yea!!!) and just brought me back a burger and a shake. Gotta go......... Cindy

August 16

Well, I know you’ve all been waiting for the latest on what’s going on in Atlanta. Even though the weekends are slow, sometimes I just don’t feel like writing.

Let me start by thanking everyone for participating in the Prayer Service. Especially  Doris and Paul Zoch, Msg. Carroll and Carol Gordon, for pulling it all together, everyone who participated, and everyone else for attending. Its sounds like it was a wonderful service, and I am anxious to see the videotape for myself.

To back up a little, last Friday I took Arianne to a local shopping mall. At first, it seemed weird to be doing something “normal,” but then I relaxed and started looking for things we wanted for Ari and Darren. It felt good to be out, but after a few hours I was anxious to get back. The weekend was quiet, as expected. However, on Sunday morning, I had some “hands on training” in Darren’s personal care. Bathing, dressing, personal care and positioning wore us both out, emotionally and physically. The whole routine took us 2 hours, and Darren needed rest after that! He was exhausted. Today was a new day, the start of a busy week of therapy, classes, counseling, etc. This morning he was learning how to put on a pair of shorts, and was told he made as much progress as someone who worked on it for three sessions. He doesn’t see the significance in that, but do you? I do! I know he is really working hard each and every session. I met with a counselor today who helped me see that each day has promise and hope. I need to learn how to balance optimism with reality, good with bad, positive with negative. We talked about making plans for home modifications, and she advised to be as patient as possible, since things (related to Darren’s condition) can change so rapidly. Easy for her to say!

While Darren was at therapy this afternoon, I went to the gym, then decided to take a walk outside. I was in search of an ice cream cone, but never found one. I did find a grocery store, so I stocked up on some food! When I returned, I was hot and sweaty, and I find Darren bundled up under his fleece blanket. It’s so strange to see him so cold, but a spinal cord injury affects (among other things) the body’s ability to control its own temperature. It’s something to always be aware of.  

Enough for now – I’m sure I’ll have more to write tomorrow. Thanks for staying connected, and I look forward to return e-mails and messages. Cynthia
August 17

Hi everyone! You'll know when I've been here awhile - I'll start saying "hey, y'all" like the natives! Everyone here is friendly and loves to call all of us honey and baby. It seems like family. Darren had a busy, tiring day. Let's see if I can remember everything. First was an hour long class about the respiratory system and how it is different than pre-injury. The number one cause of death of SCI (get used to this - spinal cord injury) patients is pneumonia. So its real important to prevent that from happening in the first place. After class, he went to OT and was working on sitting himself up and holding himself up as long as possible. You can imagine how tiring that is. But he says its getting easier. Darren also worked on putting on a t-shirt. He said that was easier than before (I didn't even know there had been a "before"). Lunch, then PT, where he tried a manual wheelchair for the first time. Yea!! He could only stay in it for half an hour, and he'll work up to more time very gradually. When a person sits in a wheelchair for long periods of time, they have to do "weight shifts" to distribute their weight off of their tail bones for at least 1 minute every half hour. Likewise, if they're in bed for prolonged periods, they have to be turned periodically, and those times have to be gradually increased as well. But back to the wheelchair - Darren was able to push himself to his room, to show me, but I wasn't there. :(  I was at the gym. Oh well, he'll try again tomorrow! His shoulders and neck were prettt tired after that, and I massaged him as best I could. After that he had a bladder test that I won't detail, and then a session at "assistive technology" where he learned about a computer program named Dragon something, which works on verbal cues. Pretty cool. Darren was asked to try eating his lunch with his right hand, which was difficult, but he managed. It took a lot of concentration and a long time, but he was patient. Last night, Darren was wondering aloud if he would be able to raise just the bar used for free weights at the gym, and we both decided - ummmm, probably not. He expressed some regret in having trained like he had - what good is it now attitude - and I nipped that in the bud pretty quickly by saying - thank goodness you WERE in such good shape before your accident; that will help you now. He agreed, maybe reluctantly, but he agreed.

Every day is a challenge, and while I am happy to report his progress, it is so difficult to see him struggling. But I try to stay focused, and be thankful for whatever the day has brought. Thank you to everyone for cards, packages and e-mails. We eagerly await the mail delivery, and we read everything. I sift through my own e-mails, and share what I can with Darren without overwhelming him. Short, positive e-mails with inspirational messages are the ones I share, the others I keep to myself. But I read them all, so keep them coming!

With love, hope and prayers,

Cynthia

August 18

OK, my update tonight might be quick - Darren was using the computer! He was checking e-mail and IM'ing his friends. It is so good for him to stay in touch with his friends. Last night, Darren & I shared some tears, and spoke of our fears and worries. Mostly it was hugs and tears. I think he is protecting me from his emotions as much, if not more, than I try to protect him from mine. But last night we cried together. That prompted me to seek out the Chaplain this morning, even though I was feeling much better. He was very understanding, offering up some suggestions for coping and healing. He said we need to cry and grieve, to let it out. Otherwise the stresses will show up later as heart problems, ulcers, etc. He explained that all of this is an unfolding process, as Darren's body heals itself. We shouldn't consider fevers or infections as setbacks, but a part of the healing. Rev. Ken thinks that an incident such as this can be considered a tragedy or a blessing - we choose which path to take. It can also be a re-birth, and part of that re-birth can be finding a new spiritual self, one that I haven't had in quite some time. I look forward to tha t. Well, enough for my healing.... Darren didn't get back in the manual chair today, but maybe tomorrow. Since his left arm and hand are sronger than his right, the therapist has been encouraging him to use his right more, like with eating. It is a struggle, as I reported yesterday, but he's getting better at it. And tonight at dinner I put a burger in his hands and he was able to eat the whole thing. His arms and hands do all the work, since he still doesn't have any movement in his fingers. But his wrist extensions are good, and that is really helpful. Well, his spirits are good tonight - we got a call from Lou Lamoriello, CEO of the Devils! He was so sincere and genuine in his conversation, amazing that he made time to call Darren. He told Darren and me that ANYTIME his spirits are down and he needs a kick in the ass, to call him. He said to stay positive, that the mind is all important now, and other motivational, inspirational comments. He was great - thanks Shelley!!! That made our day. OK, I did manage enough time to write everything I wanted, and more. The opportunity to share my thoughts with you is part of my healing, and I appreciate the opportunity. Love and prayers, Cynthia

August 19

Our quiet room just got loud again (but in a good way) with the arrival of John, Ari and Greg DeVries. They came with famous Armenian rolls from the Feredjians (thanks Kathy!), famous sandwiches from Taste of Reality (thanks Jim!) and lots of cards and presents. Thanks to all who sent anything!!! Thanks also to the anonymous sender of a balloon bouquet - it arrived without a card. so please 'fess up so we can thank you properly. Today was another successful day in therapy. Darren wheeled his manual wheelchair from the therapy room to his room, so I could see him, and then BACK AGAIN. We're guessing its about 50 yards each way so that's no small feat! His therapist was happy, and so was he. Then he received electrical stimulation on his back muscles while flexing his shoulders, and that wore him out even more. The elec stim can be used when the muscle is "firing," otherwise it can actually do some damage. But the therpist says his left tricep is firing, so the elec stim will be used on that in the future. He also ate a pork sandwich for lunch, he just needed help getting in in his grasp. Once he had his hand and fingers wrapped around it, he could bring it up and down to eat. A little messy, but tasty. Last night, we had a very special visitor. A friend of Trip (George) Winnie's in Kinnelon (thanks Trip!) has a friend who lives in Atlanta now. He called a few days ago and arranged to visit us last night. He came and spoke with Darren and me for awhile, then treated me to dinner. When he was a sophomore at Kinnelon High School, Doug suffered the same injury playing football as Darren has now. He was so inspirational and motivational; so caring and compassionate. He has recovered fully, even though it took him more than a year. So he encouraged Darren to work hard, stay focused and never give up. He told him all the right things. And dinner out was so wonderful!! It was truly a magical evening, reminding us both to never give up hope. We could see what IS possible. I am headed home for a few days, so Ari will be the official "updater" for the next several days. I look forward to seeing some of you (unfortunately I can only see a few people this time) and being home in Kinnelon. With hope, love and prayers, Cindy

August 20

I don't think I can make these updates as detailed as Mom can, but I'll do my best. Darren was very, very busy today. After morning therapy we had  surprise visitors- Julie & Alex Kramer. Darren and Alex used to be very good friends before the Kramer's moved down to Atlanta about 10 years ago. It's unfortunate that they were reunited under these circumstances, but Darren really enjoyed seeing him.

When I came down yesterday, I brought some sandwichs from the Taste of Reality Deli in Kinnelon that Darren requested. He ate a Mike's Delight today, and he finished it so fast. I'd say that has been his most enjoyed meal so far. After his afternoon therapy, he was 'interviewed' as part of a research survey that they are doing on spinal cord patients. After that, Darren was tired and now he's back in bed resting before dinner.

We received a very interesting package today- from Gilbert's Chowder House in Portland, Maine. When we take the annual ski trip up to Sugarloaf Mountain in Maine, we always stop there on the way, and Darren loves it. But we don't know who arranged for the package , so will someone from our skiing family please confess?? Darren is looking forward to a more relaxed weekend and enjoying his time while Greg is here. He thanks everyone for the cards, emails and packages he has been receiving and hopes to thank some people individually soon. Love, Ari

August 21

Note: Ari has asked me to pass along her email address to the group

distribution list.  She can be reached at: atempleton@optonline.net

Carol Gordon

A brief message fromAri today:

Through Shepherd, Darren is scheduled to go to an IMAX movie today-his first time out of the hospital. Should be exciting...Greg DeVries (his friend from Kinnelon who is visitng for a few days) and I will go with him. Even though it might be hard as Darren's first public outing in a wheelchair, I think he's excited about it, as we all are.

August 21- second update

After Darren's shower and short therapy session this morning, he was scheduled for an outing to the IMAX theater. Only two other patients went, so Greg and I were able to accompany Darren on the bus ride to the show.  This was Darren's first experience in public in a wheelchair.  It went better than I expected it to and everything went pretty smoothly. The only thing that seemed to bother Darren was when people looked at him, especially young kids, but other than that I think Darren really enjoyed leaving the center and getting out. The movie wasn't the most exciting, but since it was his first outing it was pretty short and not too complicated.

Several of Darren's friends chipped in to buy him an ipod, which he has been listening to and enjoying a lot, so thanks guys!  We were also able to watch the movie that a bunch of his friends from school made last week, so he enjoyed seeing that. Greg was able to hook up the dvd player to the big TV which we put at the end of his bed so he can watch it comfortably in bed tonight.

Darren's roommate, Paul, was able to move his big toe on his right foot today. It was a very exciting event in room 217. Paul's accident was on June 26th, so he's been here a while longer than Darren, but it's a great sign.

The weekends are pretty slow and uneventful here, so Darren's just taking it easy and enjoying his company and the nice Atlanta weather.

Love, Ari

August 22

Sundays are very relaxed days here at Shepherd. No therapy, and nothing is usually scheduled. We went to the worship service this afternoon that was run by the chaplain. A guest speaker, who was currently a day patient at Shepherd (after you are a patient at Shepherd for about 8-10 weeks you move to the day program where you live in an apartment with a family member near the Shepherd building) spoke about his journey and the obstacles he faced. It was very inspirational. We then enjoyed a nice lunch in the garden and just spent a while out there.

Once Darren got back into bed this morning, his feet were pretty swollen. The nurse thinks it's edema, which is caused by sitting up in the chair for periods of time. Although Darren's never had this, it is possible for it to occur. They gave him Tylenol, and elevated his feet on the bed. Hopefully that'll take care of the problem.

Tomorrow he has a very busy day-only one hour off for lunch between 9am - 4pm. He's just watching a movie in bed now and resting up for his busy dayand week ahead.

He definitely enjoyed having a pretty laidback weekend and loved seeing Greg. His first outing yesterday was successful. 

For those of you are new to the list, if you'd like to contact Darren, you can go to:

www.Shepherd.org, click "contact us" then "contact a patient".

or you can send him mail to:

Darren Templeton

Case Manager-Pam Winter

2020 Peachtree Rd., NW

Atlanta, GA 30309

This is my last update since Greg and I are going home tomorrow. Mom will be back on Tuesday. Love, Ari
 August 23

This is a poem that John appreciated and asked me to forward to the group distribution list.  It was written by Joe Hofmann, a business associate of John's from many years ago.

I've lived next door to John and Cindy for about 20 years now, and it's never ceased to amaze me how diligent they are about keeping in contact with so many people.  I think we all know how easy it is to lose touch, but the Templetons should be an example to us about the importance and comfort of maintaining ties with our past.

C.Gordon

                             Broken Hearts

For Darren Templeton

Life sometimes seems so unfair         

So say children everywhere

No one even seems to care

Shattered dreams and such despair

Hear their laughter fill the air

No tears falling anywhere

Oh how quickly life repairs

Broken hearts caught unawares

Faith and hope will get you there

It can’t hurt to say a prayer

Take the challenge if you dare

Reach your goals with time to spare

by Joe Hofmann 8/11/04

August 25

Hi everyone, I know you're anxious to hear news on Darren, so I'll write up something quick this morning. I was so happy to be home, but I was also SO happy to get back, too. Darren was resting when I arrived, but when he opened his eyes and smiled, that's all I needed! He's been fighting a fever, and now has a blood infection. I'm not sure what it means, but he's now on a different antibiotic. I hope to be speaking with the Doctor later this morning. He's feeling pretty good, though. He went to class and is off to therapy in just a few minutes. I spoke with his PT for just a bit, and she said that Darren is working really hard, every session. He's making improvements, but progress is very slow and sometimes hard to see and appreciate. She said he's a great patient to work with! I am doing some housekeeping this morning - so many packages have arrived that I am sorting through. Thank you to everyone for sending such wonderful things!!! We are truly appreciative of everything that's been received. I'll try to do an update later this evening............ Cindy

August 25—second update

Hi everyone, I'm glad to be back in Atlanta with Darren. It was good to be home with family and friends, but I was anxious to come back, too. When I saw that thousand watt smile, I knew why I had missed him. When I arrived, Darren was resting, but there was just enough time to help him eat a Mike's Delight sandwich from Jim's, then get ready and go to the movies. We saw Bourne Supremacy with four other patients and their caregivers. It was my first time out "in public" with Darren, and it went better than I expected. I think that was because we were with other people in wheelchairs, and our accompanying staff knew exactly what to do. But Darren purchased his own ticket and gave it to the ticket checker ( a man in a wheelchair, by the way). With some assistance, I could see Darren going to the movies with his friends (except for the personal care issues which might have to be addressed). Anyway, it was good for him to get out, but he was ready to get back to Shepherd, too. He went right to bed, and I went back to the apartment a little before 11pm. Then I realized I was hungry - I never ate any dinner! Two pop-tarts and a cup of tea, some Olympics and I went to bed. I was exhaust ed, too.

After some confusion, it was determined that Darren did NOT have a blood infection after all. Thank goodness. He still has a urinary tract infection, but that seems less worrisome. He was feeling good today. Today was a pretty normal day of therapy and class, then an afternoon ultrasound to make sure there were no blood clots in his legs - a routine thing to check. Luckily, there were none. But since he had to be in bed for the ultrasound, he figured he'd take a little nap! Then he got up for dinner and now he's watching TV. A little earlier, he made a few phone calls and sent 2 e-mails to 2 lucky recipients! Hopefully, he'll feel up to more of that in the coming days. I hope so, as he likes to feel in contact with everyone, too.

While I was home in NJ, Darren was scheduled to go to the gym, and got a look at some of the equipment and exercises he can start to do. I hope that he and I can go tomorrow or Friday so I can learn how I can help him on the machines. It just depends on how tired he is after his therapy and if he has enough energy for more! I took a few pictures that Ari helped me post on Sony ImageStation. Click on this link to see them

http://www.imagestation.com/album/?id=4229700093&code=11492301&mode=invite&cmp=EMC-AlbumInvite

If you've never been to that site, you'll have to register, but its quick and easy. I hope you enjoy the pictures.

Enough for now! With love, prayers and hope,

Cynthia

August 26

Hi everyone! It seems hard to believe that I spend more than 12 hours at Shepherd each day, and the time seems to fly by! When Darren has a full schedule, it seems I do, too. And today was a whirlwind. Busy morning, very chaotic lunch hour, busy afternoon, early dinner. I can hardly believe its 8pm already. Darren started working on "sliding board transfers" today and said it was really hard and he really wasn't able to do it. Watch for updates; I hope to be able to report on significant progress in a week or so. He spent more time in his manual chair today, too. The hour allotted for lunch was almost completely taken up with Darren learning to perform his own bladder care. Of course, it takes much longer to do with him trying to do it himself, then he had about 5 minutes to eat. Not good! But he didn't want to be late for therapy, so lunch had to wait. During his therapy session, I went to the gym, and when I came back, he was nowhere to be found. I looked in the usual spots, but I didn't check one of the outside areas where the sun was shining - that's where he was! It was birthday celebration night tonight. One roommate's was yesterday, the other today. Around 5:30 tonight, lots of the boys gathered in the gym for a pizza party, and it was fun. Pizza, conversation, photos - a real social gathering! Darren was able to hold his own pizza slice and eat by himself. Even a kid who was in a car accident and broke C6/7 was there - walking! His accident was about 3 years ago. During my treadmill session today, I decided that I was going to try to find as many success stories as possible, and make contact with anyone willing to share their story with Darren. I truly believe that Darren will walk again, but to keep his spirits up and help him stay positive - I can't do it all alone. So if ANYONE knows of someone who has been in a similar situation, or had a similar accident, and you're willing to help me make contact or give me information, that would be SO helpful.

Today, Darren received a WONDERFUL present - an autographed authentic 2004 NHL Eastern Conference All Star Jersey - signed by the whole All Star conference team!!! It is SO awesome! And the fact that it includes 3 Devils players is even better! Thank you, Bill - you're the best!!! Thanks to everyone who sends us packages, and cards and e-mails, too. I am trying to start e-mailing personal thank you's, but until then, one great big THANK YOU!!! Well, Darren tells me that his OT is coming at 7:30 am to help him put on his t-shirt in the morning. As he says - "that should be interesting." And I agree. I don't think I'll be here to see it, but I'll get a report....I hope to be able to report on lots of different kinds of progress in the next few weeks. Keep the prayers coming....we need them all!!! With love and hope, Cynthia PS Check the picture site again; Ari is adding more pictures. (Thanks, Ari!!)

August 27

Hello everyone, sorry for the lateness of this; thought I would get to it earlier tonight. But I had more personal care training, and then it took FOREVER to get Darren's TED stockings on. Ever try to put stockings on someone else? Tight stockings? On legs that are HEAVY?? Well, this isn't the first time I tried it, but for some reason they weren't cooperating, and now my back is hurting and I'm TIRED. But enough about me. Darren asked if I would include in my update thanks to everyone for all they've been doing. He viewed the photo album for the first time tonight, and read the guestbook. He was visibly moved by some of the comments. And we received more packages today - thanks again! I AM keeping a list, so I can eventually (soon, I hope) thank everyone personally. There just never seems to be enough time in the day, and the days are long. This morning, Darren had his OT session eraly, and it consisted of dressing himself and brushing his own teeth. But it was so much more than it sounds. He was successful with getting on his T-shirt, so that was improvement! He had quite a hard time with his pants, and needed a lot of help. He tried getting his toothbrush and toothpaste out of his cabinet (it fell because it was heavier than he thought), he put the paste on the brush, brushed his teeth and rinsed out. Pretty much all by himself. Quite impressive. After a skin class where he saw very graphic examples of not taking care of his skin, and a PT session, he was wiped out. He hardly ate any lunch, and slept for several hours this afternoon. The rest of the roommates were resting, too, so the room was quiet and he got some good sleep. The he was feeling much better for dinner, but running a fever again. Just can't seem to pinpoint the cause of the fever.

Anyway, that was our day.

I did meet a nurse at the gym today who works here on a different floor, and she had some really good insights and perspectives. She introduced me to a 32 year old C5/7 who is in a wheelchair but competely independent. His injury was 7 years ago, and his upper body looked SO strong. She works out with him 3 times a week, and she says he is very committed to staying strong and in shape. It takes a lot, though. Well, I'll try to keep everyone updated throughout the weekend. Enjoy, and keep us in your prayers. With love and hope, Cynthia

August 29

Hello everyone! Darren is still fighting a fever - cause unknown - but the nursing staff is all over it. Doctors will be in on Monday. Frustrating, because its wiping him out. A half day of activity is about all he can handle. So if the morning is good, the afternoon is shot. Or vice versa. I hope we can solve the mystery SOON!!! We were so happy to have visitors yeaterday - Saturday. Charlene and Michael Butera came down, and we had a very nice day together. Darren showed Michael what he could do in the gym, and Michael helped him even more. We were outside in the garden for a bit, then came inside just before a sun shower came! Then minutes later, it was hotter than hot again. While Darren rested, we went across the street to Friday's for drinks (a first for me!) then ordered take-out to bring back to Darren's room. It wasn't exactly the same as a restuarant meal, but better than hospital/cafeteria food! All in all, it was great to have friends here, both for us and Darren. Well, back to the tougher schedule tomorrow - hopefully Darren will be up to the tasks at hand. If his body cooperates, I know his mind will be determined, as always. I'll let you know............... Love Cynthia

August 30

Hi everyone, another day of high temperatures and Darren feeling wiped out. This is getting really old, and he's so frustrated. Instead of going to his afternoon physical therapy session, he went for an MRI. And he wasn't too happy about missing it, but he also wants to find out why he has the high temps. This morning, he had both a chest X-Ray and an X-ray of his hips/pelvis. Then the MRI of the hips. Internal medicine and Infectious Diseases have both been consulted, so they are doing everything they can think of to try to find the reason behind the fevers. One thing they're trying is discontinue the Augmentin that he's on for the urinary tract infection. Maybe he's reacting to it. The Doctor had a patient about 10 years ago that had an infection in his hip, and was running fevers. It took them forever to pinpoint it, and he hasn't forgotten that. So that was the reason for checking the hips....we'll see what the results are tomorrow, I guess. I wish I were writing about therapy and progress and good news, but some days are like this, I guess. Unfortunately, on days like this, we focus on getting him well, and there's no energy for rehab. Again, today, he had only half a good day. We pray for whole days of feeling better, working at rehab and recovery. Please continue your prayers. Love Cynthia

August 31

Hi everyone, another day of medical mysteries. Darren felt fine to go to class and a morning session of OT, then he was told the Doctor wanted to check his legs again for blood clots. So back into bed for that, then off to adjacent Piedmont Hospital for a hip aspiration. The Doctor had seen some fluid in Darren's hips on the MRI done yesterday, and he wanted it checked for bacteria. Before he got the results, he explained what would be done if the fluid was infected, and it would have meant surgery tonight to clean out the hips and pack them with antibiotic. Awaiting the results meant no dinner and no outing. But the results were negative - no bacteria. That IS a good thing, but now we're back to square one again with the fever, which has been going up and down all day again. We were able to eat about 7pm, but Darren was not able to go on the outing to Galyan's - a huge sporting goods store. Too bad, since his roommates were going, and he was looking forward to it. Oh well, a nother day, as Darren says. His spirits are pretty good, despite these setbacks. Yesterday, he did get his neck brace/collar off, so he was happy about that. He is starting to move his neck more now, and will do new exercises in therapy now that it's off. During his OT session, he worked more on dressing himself - putting on a T-shirt and shorts. He said the shirt is getting easier, but the shorts are really hard. His arms are not strong enough to lift his legs, but I'm sure he'll see improvement doing that, too. Today, I realized that there are challenges and triumphs every day. Right now, the challenges seem huge and the triumphs small, but they are there. I just need to look for them, and focus on them. I have started reading "Love, Medicine and Miracles" by Bernie Siegel, and it makes a lot of sense to me so far. Thank you to those who suggested it, and to the one who delivered it! So far, I see Darren as the "exceptional patient" that Dr. Siegel describes: one who is involved in his own care, wants to be educated and made "doctors" of their own cases, and have an "inner locus of control." I've been telling Darren about the concepts, and I can't wait til he's up to reading it. I think it will be a tremendous help to us both. Please check out the pictures, and be sure to add a message to the guestbook at the end. http://www.imagestation.com/member/join_signin_prompt.html?album_idB29700093&rf=u=Falbum%2F%3Fid%3D4229700093%26mode%3Dinvi

Also, in preparation for some downtime this long, holiday weekend, I think it might be nice for Darren to receive some e-mails of his own. Please send to "puckzman16@yahoo.com." I think he'll enjoy getting some mail. I don't like to discourage anyone from sending things, but we have reached a saturation point of food, snacks, cookies, etc. We could compete with the snack cart that comes around each night! So thanks for the goodies everyone, but send cards and letters. We still love getting mail every day. And you can still send e-mails through the Shepherd site – contact us – contact a patient. They are printed out and delivered with the mail. With love and prayers, and hope that these fevers go away, Cynthia

September 1

Hi everyone, another interesting day here at Shepherd. Despite a fever of 103.8 during the night, it dropped down by the morning. Darren was exhausted, though, since he didn't sleep well, so he skipped class in favor of saving his energy for therapy. He did make both his therapy sessions today - yea!!! But in between lunch and afternoon PT, nurses and techs whipped into his room, dismantling it without an explanation of what was going on. It turns out he has a bowel infection "C-Diff" which can be treated by a specific antibiotic, and will take at least 7-10 days to clear up. Some can last a month, but we certainly hope that doesn't happen. There seems to be some difference of opinion in whether the C-Diff has been causing the fever. Some say it is, some say it might not be. One thing that happens with C-Diff is that the patient is put into a room by himself - isolation - which means that gowns and gloves must be worn when any contact with the patient is made. I can sit here

in the room without one, but if I do his bladder care, or change his clothes, I should wear a gown and gloves. Also, any nurses, techs or therapists have to wear gowns as well. Darren can still go to therapy, class, etc., just extra precautions have to be taken because the infection is very contagious. On the positive side, Darren is figuring how to do more and more with his hands, devising ways to get things done even though his fingers aren't working. And he said he can pretty much get his own T-shirt on in therapy. So, again, baby steps of improvement. I was pretty frazzled with the way the room change was made today, and it sent me into a crying spell. It just seemed that NOTHING was going his way, and everything has been a struggle. I made it known to the staff that I was unhappy, and I received 2 apologies from nurses - his own nurse and the charge nurse - that, yes, the situation had not been handled well. After that, I said OK, time to move on and get him better. If this is what it takes, let's get to it. And Darren felt the same. Well, I need to end so I can try to hitch a ride back to the apt with another family. I move out tomorrow, into the hotel next door. With love and prayers, Cynthia 

September 2

Hi everyone, hard to believe that our first 30 days are over, and I had to move out of the apartments they provide for the families. In one way, it has gone so fast, in another it has seemed like an eternity. A few items that I don't want to forget to tell everyone: we have received a lot of stuff from the Devils, Nets, and Jets. They have been very generous, and I understand a lot of different people have asked. So thanks for your efforts everyone, and now that they have responded, there is no need to keep asking. His room is well decorated, by the way, with all the cool stuff he has received. A while back, Darren received a beautiful framed print from Successories entitled "The Power of Attitude." It arrived anonymously and I thought I knew who sent it, but it wasn't them! So please let us know who the giver is! OK, today's news: it feels like we are back in the hospital, taking care of Darren's sickness(es) rather than in a rehab center. While they found this infection, the C-Diff, it causes stomach upset and diarrhea. So even though the fevers are not as high, or at least they weren't today, now there are other symptoms to treat. A never-ending saga, it seems. I only hope that he gets all of this out of the way before we come home, so we don't have these kinds of problems later. On the positive side, Darren is FEELING his stomach, so I think that's a good thing. He even said last night he's starting to feel the needle he gets in the stomach, and that's new. He also described a really weird sensation in his knee, like a piece of metal turning around and around in there. Strange, but maybe good??? We certainly hope so....... Its quiet now, being in a room by ourselves, but maybe it will help Darren sleep a little better. It does get boring, though. Keep the e-mails, cards and letters coming! They always brighten our days and make us smile, reminded by our friends' prayers, support and love.

With love and hope, Cynthia

September 3

Another day, another question mark about why Darren feels like he does. His temp went up to 103 last night, but this morning he was back to feeling OK. What a roller coaster. As the day wore on, he was complaining about a sore throat, and they tested him for strep. They put him right on penicillin, just in case it is. So another antibiotic, and I wonder how that will affect the C-diff and the flagill they're using to treat that. Right now, we'll wait on the strep and see what happens. In the meantime, his OT session was feeding himself breakfast and dressing himself. Up until now, he has been getting fed breakfast since he's still in bed and its much harder to eat on his own. Not anymore! At least according to Amy, his OT. Then he dressed himself, and he did better than last time. Still hard with the pants, but better, and better with the T-shirt as well. After that, he was exhausted and slept another hour and a half! Since he had to stay in his room til 2pm today (a 24 hour restriction because of the infection), he figured he may as well rest! Then when he got up, he brushed his own teeth, and did that better than before, also. He gets frustrated, but he is making improvements. After his afternoon PT session, he was tired, but since it was nice, we went outside to read his mail and take in some sun. Since he wasn't running a fever, he could afford to get a little warmer, and it felt good to both of us. A new roommate moved in today. He's been in ICU for 4 or 5 days, and has the same infection that Darren has. He is 16, from Alabama, and was in a car accident about 4 weeks ago. He was in an a hospital in CA, and I know he had a halo, his break is C6/7. He is already moving at least one leg, and seems like a really nice boy. I'm sure we'll get to know him better in the next few days. Well, we are looking forward to having some local visitors this weekend to break the monotony of long days. Not that Darren doesn't need the rest, but a little company will be nice. I hope you all enjoy the long holiday weekend, and keep us in your prayers. Love Cynthia

September 4

Hi everyone, it was a nice day here in Atlanta, so Darren was able to get outside and enjoy some fresh air and sun. Unfortunately, his fever went up after that, and he got back in bed for a bit this afternoon to take a rest. Sometimes when his fever is high, he still feels OK, so he does as much as he is able. He was up again for dinner, but is just eating bland foods because his stomach is still uneasy. But his strep test came back negative, so that's good because I didn't like the fact he'd be on two different antibiotics. Besides, there's a good chance I would've come down with it, too! John and Ari arrvived late last night, and Darren was happy to see them, especially Ari. When we were outside, they went off on their own and were chatting up a storm together. It seems like they are so much more than brother and sister now. Being next door in the hotel is very nice. Costly, but so close and easy to go back and forth, and a nice large comfortable area. I'm happy about that. A last minute planned visit today from Mary Fasciano. Many of you know Mary as Darren's and Ari's babysitter for many, many years. She became part of our family, and is a very special person. As I write this, Darren is showing Mary around, just to get out of the room a little and show her the pool, the therapy room, etc. Its good for both of them. I hope you all have a safe and happy holiday weekend. Please keep in touch and continue your prayers. Love Cynthia

September 5

Today was not as quiet as Sundays past. Relaxing but more activity than usual. In a good way! Darren had an early shower, then rested more after that. He got out of bed before lunch, ate lunch and went outside for some fresh air. It was really a beautiful day, and there were lots of people out. Mary's visit continued, and she joined us at the Worship Service. The service included a moving sermon (at least for me) about not looking elsewhere for God, but looking within yourself. Not asking God to help you, but accepting his help. There was a wonderful choir, who ended the service with a Circle of Love (everyone holding hands) singing Amazing Grace. Needless to say, a few tears were shed during that (during the whole service, for me...). In one way I felt uplifted, in another way I was drained. In fact, afterward, since Darren was in his chair, I laid on his bed and slept a little! Later in the afternoon, Julie, Mark and Alex Kramer came for a visit. They brought food for Darren - hamburger, fries and a shake - visited for awhile then took John and me out to dinner. We had a really nice time, and I knew Darren was being kept company by Alex, who brought a DVD to make him laugh. Meanwhile, Ari and Mary went out for dinner themselves. People keep asking what they can do for us, and I know everyone wants to do something. Mary and the Kramers did what so many others are unable to do - they gave us their time. Don't get me wrong, I know some of you would be here in a heartbeat, and we appreciate your offers to come. It just worked out perfectly for Mary to come this weekend, and the Kramers live nearby enough for a visit. Their hugs, comforting words and loving support will be enough to get me through a few more days. I keep their hugs in my memory bank, and draw on them when I need them. Maybe sounds strange, but it works for me! Well, Shepherd has some activities planned for Labor Day tomorrow, and I don't know what they are exactly, so I'll report on them tomorrow night. I'll end by saying that even though Darren's temperatures were rising and falling again today, he was really feeling OK, and managed to keep down not only the burger and fries, but a few bites of a delicious chocolate cake, too. With love, prayers and thanks to our angels of the weekend,

Cynthia
September 6

With Hurricane Frances quickly approaching the Atlanta area, the winds have been heavy and rain is coming. The lousy weather has a way of making everyone else feel lousy. Darren has managed to get his fever down, but still gets exhausted very easily, especially after therapy. My mom is also feeling under the weather and opted to go back to the hotel this afternoon and just rest for the remainder of the day. Assuming our flight doesn't get cancelled or delayed, my dad and I will be flying back home tomorrow, so my mom wants to make sure she's feeling better for the week ahead.

The doctors are still trying to pinpoint the cause of these fevers, and are now running all sorts of tests on different things. Hopefully by the end of this week they will know for sure what it is, and be able to give him the right treatment so he can get back to his normal, determined self.

On a brighter note, we had a visit from Barbara Glauss today, a friend who used to live in northern New Jersey, and now lives in Atlanta. It was nice to have her around for a few hours this afternoon. And the big news of the day, Darren is able to wiggle the pointer and middle fingers on his left hand. He claims that he's had the pointer for about 2 days, and just got the middle finger today. He just chose not to share that with anyone. The wiggle is ever so slight, but it is definitely there. He has also began to get spasms that make his legs and feet move. They are neither good nor bad. Some say it's good, some say it doesn't make a difference. But we are going to say that it's a good thing, since it can't hurt. 

New pictures will be added to the website within the next day or two, when I get home. For those of you that are new to the list and aren't aware of the site,  I'll make sure the invitation to the site gets forwarded to all of you tonight as well. Be sure to add comments to the guestbook at the end of the album, we read them to Darren.

Continue the prayers.

Much love, Ari

September 7

Hi everyone, this is my second attempt, as I did something wrong, and Poof, my entire e-mail was gone. Hope I can re-create it.... I am feeling better after my day of R&R yesterday. Back today in true form and taking care of Darren. Last night, his fever did not spike, so that's 3 nights in a row! Yea! He's still running a low grade fever during the day, though. Infectious Diseases is still running various tests, as Darren says a "laundry list" of possibilities. They certainly seem to be thorough. He still is tired, but made it through his class and therapy sessions. Right now, he's taking a "power nap" so he can watch the tennis on TV. I hope he can stay awake for that, then get a good night's sleep. We were all so excited about the movement of the 2 fingers, and yet he chose to keep that to himself! I know you all are excited, too. Keep praying, and I just KNOW more recovery is to come. Not much else to report, except that Frances brought lots of wind and rain to the area today. Traffic lights weren't working, and schools were closed, so that affected the staffing to some degree. The garden here is strewn with branches, leaves and plants that were blown about. Its still raining now, but it is expected to stop late tonight. I look forward to some sunshine tomorrow, and a brighter day. Keep praying for Darren and all of us. Love Cynthia

September 8

I used to believe the saying "when Mama's happy, everyone's happy." Now its when Darren is happy, everyone is happy. Or shall I say feeling better. He's not feeling great, but better, and I'll take that today and yesterday. I feel better, too. He's eating more, is not as tired, and is in a better mood. Progress!

Today, he was working more on "transfers," moving himself from one surface to another, i.e. from his manual wheelchair to the PT mat. Eventually that will mean moving from his chair to his bed, instead of being lifted, his chair to a car, to a kitchen chair, etc. Once he is able to accomplish that, he will have so much more independence. Its a slow process, but he says its getting easier. One day, I'll sneak into therapy and watch him. Then I'll have more to report!

Darren said that he can't wait til he's home and the 4 of us all have dinner together in the kitchen, eating a meal that I've made. Imagine that - wanting one of my dinners! But seriously, it just points out what he's missing - home, the 4 of us together, "normal things." It pains me because it will be a "new normal," yet I can't wait to get him home, too. Such conflicting feelings.

Please check the picture site again, as new pictures have been added. And please sign the guestbook. Its great to read all the new posts. Here's the link again: http://www.imagestation.com/album/?id=4229700093&mode=invi&idx=0

I don't usually report on gifts received in my updates, but I can't help myself on this one. Ian Hamilton arranged a signed, oversized tennis ball from Andy Roddick - how cool is that??!! Thank you! Add that to the Devils, Nets and Jets memorabilia and we are accumulating quite an impressive collection! Thank you to all those who had anything to do with receiving these wonderful gifts - you know who you are!!!  We still look forward to getting mail every day. Please keep the cards, letters and e-mails through the Shepherd website coming. Anything to brighten his day is very welcomed!!!

With love and prayers, Cynthia

September 9

Hi everyone, I'm writing early tonight so that maybe Darren can get all settled and we can watch The Apprentice without interruption. We'll see... Today started out really well. The sun was shining, it was a beautiful day and I was in a good mood. So was Darren. He was awake, washed and dressed, ready to get up.

First scheduled was an Assistive Technology class, and the instructor came here to help Darren learn to use "Dragon" - a voice recognition software program. He needs more practice, but it will be really helpful. Next was PT, but thanks to the laxative he was given last night, he didn't last long and he was back in the room, where he's been ever since. With the C-diff infection, an involuntary BM means a 24 hour confinement to his room. He can either be in bed or his chair, but he has to stay in his room. Real bummer. But his therapists can come in to do range of motion exercises and other training, so he did get some therapy. Not quite the same as going to the gym for 2 sessions, though. The Chaplain stopped by for a quick visit, and his message was uplifting and inspiring, suggesting that Darren focus on the "trilogy of being": mind, body and spirit. He had other good things to say as well. He is always encouraging and relays meaningful messages. Despite this setback, Darren's outlook was quite positive. He is feeling so much better, and he knows this was a result of the laxative, and not the infection. He is anxious to finish this round of the antibiotic and get tested again to see if he is clear. We certainly hope so! In the meantime, he impressed me by eating potato chips out of the bag, only dropping a few. Even some he dropped he was able to retrieve. And for dinner he ate a meatball sub, mostly by himself. He dripped some sauce, but hey, who doesn't?? He really is trying to do as much as possible by himself. Well, sorry about the personal stuff, but if you're gonna hear the good, you gotta hear the bad, too, sometimes. I try to be as sensitive as possible in describing these kinds of events. Its not pleasant, but it is part of our day. Hope I didn't make anyone uncomfortable. Well, here's to better days and a good weekend. Darren's looking forward to a visit from Arek and Eli. Should be fun! Love and prayers, Cynthia

P.S. Darren read the posts on the picture site tonight, and was quite surprised (pleasantly!) at the number of new messages. So keep them coming - thanks!!!

September 10

Hi everyone, another hot sunny day in Atlanta today, and Darren got outside to enjoy the sunshine this afternoon. That always makes him happy. This morning, he had morning OT again, so he started early. He washed himself as much as possible in the shower, dressed himself as much as possible and then fed himself breakfast. Then he went right to class, then to PT after that. He came back in his manual chair, after transferring himself (with help) into it, ate lunch in that chair, then participated in a research study survey, which is when he was outside. Do I have to tell you how tired he was after that?? He was then ready for a nap, since he was going to the mall tonight. Again, he looked better, ate better, and felt better the whole day. The Infectious Disease Doctor is still looking for something going on in his body that might be "hiding," and he is determined to find the cause. He is almost finished this round of the flagyl (antibiotic for the C-diff infection), and I am so glad he is feeling better. But it would be good to know what is going on in there! In the meantime, they keep taking blood, running tests, etc. So tonight we went to the mall. It was just Darren and me, another patient Michael and his girlfriend, a recreational therapist and the driver. It was a worthwhile trip for a lot of reasons. First, it got us out of here. Second, it was fun! We ate Chinese food, shopped, walked around and talked. Third, its good to get Darren into situations where he needs to fend for himself to an extent and figure out how to do things, like handle money, get in and out of doors, manuever around obstacles and through narrow aisles, etc. We enjoyed ourselves. Now we wait for Arek and Eli, and I think I'm looking forward to their visit just as much as Darren! The weather is supposed to be nice, and I think we'll have a barbeque for Saturday dinner. We've seen other families and groups do that, and it looks like fun.

I hope you all have a good weekend, and if I don't send an update, you'll know we've been busy!!! With love, prayers and positive thoughts, Cynthia

Just a note:

For those of you who don't know, when Cindy refers to Arek and Eli below, that's the Honeysuckle Lane contingent.  The Templeton’s live at #8.  Arek Feredjian is their neighbor to the left at #6 and Eli is my son.  We're at #10.  Our kids have grown up together.  We've all lived here about 20 years.  There are seven kids between the three households ranging in age from 16 - 23 and even though they're not all the same age, they're very fond of one another and have many, many shared childhood memories.

Regards,

Carol Gordon
September 11 & 12

Hi everyone, its Sunday night, so I have the weekend to catch up on. No, you didn't miss an e-mail; I just didn't get to it last night! Arek and Eli arrived late Friday night. Their flight was delayed, so it was too late for them to see Darren that night. But we stayed up and talked for about an hour. It was a pleasure to see them and catch up on their summer adventures. They also had a a lot of questions about Darren and his condition, so it was good that we had a chance to talk before they saw him. Saturday morning started out early for Darren as he had his morning shower and dressing with the Occupational Therapist. Then he rested for awhile until we came over. But once we came, he was ready to get up and out of bed. He was happy to see Arek and Eli. They went outside for awhile and into the recreation room downstairs. I tried to give them some space and let them catch up with each other. For lunch, they took Darren to the Chick-Fil-A, which I thought was OK, but turned out to be "iilegal." Oh well, they were fine, and even better that they got away with something! While they were out, I went to the grocery store to buy what we needed for our much-anticipated barbeque. After they watched a video of kids that Arek and Eli brought with them, we prepared for the BBQ, only to discover we needed charcoal - DUH!!! But they found some, and we were in business. It was just burgers, but it was different, and we had fun. Check the photo site for new pictures - as soon as Ari can get them posted, they'll be there. After dinner I left them alone for a while. I went back to the hotel and they were watching a DVD. Again, after we left Darren, we went back to the hotel and just talked.

Today, they only had a few hours together, but they helped Darren with his breakfast then went outside and just "chilled." Luckily, both days were really nice weather. The rest of the day was quiet, just spent watching TV and resting. Darren was so happy that they came to visit; it was great for all of them, including me. I know the relationships that 6-8-10 Honeysuckle have are rare, and I am so appreciative each time I think about it. It can be any combination of children, adults, even grandparents and relatives - it is always an enjoyable time. And this weekend was even more special than most, since they had to  make a special trip. Thank you to the Gordons and Feredjians for making it happen! Well enough for now, I've probably bored you to tears with this one! I hope you all had wonderful weekends. I know we did, and we are well, rested and ready for a busy week. "My friend Betty" will be visiting for a few days this week, and I am anxious to see her and spend time with her. I look forward to her coming! With love and prayers, Cynthia

Link for photos: (please remember to write a message in the guestbook) http://www.imagestation.com/album/review.html?id=4229700093&mode=invi